Happy Valentines Day people!
Well I know that valentines day is today but it was yesterday that me and the boyfriend went out for dinner. I got all dressed up in the cutest little black silk dress with some awesome heels and we went out for an Indian. I love Indian! I had (and always have) Tandoori chicken for a starter then for main I get egg fried rice, cheese naan and chicken tikka. It was yummers!
The boyfriend was a little bit odd acting but I think he was trying to be all gentlemanly and have manners, something that doesn't come in the usual everyday bundle. Currently we are lying in his ever so comfy double bed eating haribo and pondering breakfast. I'm thinking some sort of bread, with some kind of egg and some sort of meat. Yum. I guess I'm going to be cooking.
Oh and I got three delicio smelling candles (currently burning one that smells like chocolate cake) and two single roses. (and another from the lovely people at the resturant).
And I bought a tiny suitcase yesterday too. That makes me so unbelievably happy.
Look forward to talking to you again, I'm gonna go and enjoy the rest of my V day. (That's valentines, not vampire.((although that would be pretty cool too. )) )
Showing posts with label boyfriend. Show all posts
Showing posts with label boyfriend. Show all posts
Sunday, 14 February 2010
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
One Mega Update
I do so apologise for the fact I haven't posted in more than a few days, a particularly long time in the world of Belle. I have actually been mainly talking to Beau, my spiritual guidance partner and great listener: also known as Diary.
{{Quick update of all not related to main topic: I went belly dancing for the second time, we are learning a routine and I feel empowered and sexy by it. My English coursework has taken up many of my frees and I have become crushed by the fact someone has already done it miles and miles better than me. I'm reading another N.G book and the beauty of it's words are so encapsulating it's like a blanket of sensuality. (Check that out.) Friends are fine, feeling closer to Cheshire more and more. Struggling to connect to the Wallflower.}}
Recently I have been obsessed by men. (Or are they boys, what a conundrum). There is The Handsome One who I always thought was the strong and silent type with a gorgeous jaw and handsomely hooded brows. Turns out he's more a cheeky and comical bloke (That doesn't fit either...) and the words devilishly handsome spring to mind. He's become a key player in my eye-candy-cupboard. If I see him, I usually smile and it's pleasing me that nowadays I get one back.
Then there is the New Crush. Now New Crush has actually been mentioned heavily before in my entries but I can't use his other name/initials. Takes out all the fun. He gives, or rather gave, me lots of attention and was very sweet and gorgeously cuddly. When my boyfriend was away with a chest infection (Not man-flu or swine-flu) he was the one who was my substitute.
However.
He has then crushed my hopes and aspirations of him falling madly in love with me and begging for my love, only for me to politely decline and float away all-fairy-like with a halo of sunshine... Yes, crushed all that purely by one mean flippant comment. He has a mean streak and I do not like it. It has put me off.
Then there is the Boyfriend. As he was off for a total week I got a feel for what it would be like if he wasn't featured in my life. If he didn't exist. I quite liked it. I could hang out with my friends and not have to wait for someone who is running late at the end of the day, I could choose whoever I wanted to sit with at lunch without any fear of leaving people out, I could flirt like mad with anyone and nobody could stop me.
However. (Ha, again.)
I missed having someone to help me find my bus so I don't look crazy walking towards a bus only to realise it's not mine. (Damn mild shortsightedness). I missed someone waiting at my locker after I've just taught wild year nines to calm me down. I missed having someone looked agast every morning at how lovely I looked.
My life is full of contradictions and inconsistencies at the minute but it is a touch more interesting than the norm, so I don't mind.
:D
{{Quick update of all not related to main topic: I went belly dancing for the second time, we are learning a routine and I feel empowered and sexy by it. My English coursework has taken up many of my frees and I have become crushed by the fact someone has already done it miles and miles better than me. I'm reading another N.G book and the beauty of it's words are so encapsulating it's like a blanket of sensuality. (Check that out.) Friends are fine, feeling closer to Cheshire more and more. Struggling to connect to the Wallflower.}}
Recently I have been obsessed by men. (Or are they boys, what a conundrum). There is The Handsome One who I always thought was the strong and silent type with a gorgeous jaw and handsomely hooded brows. Turns out he's more a cheeky and comical bloke (That doesn't fit either...) and the words devilishly handsome spring to mind. He's become a key player in my eye-candy-cupboard. If I see him, I usually smile and it's pleasing me that nowadays I get one back.Then there is the New Crush. Now New Crush has actually been mentioned heavily before in my entries but I can't use his other name/initials. Takes out all the fun. He gives, or rather gave, me lots of attention and was very sweet and gorgeously cuddly. When my boyfriend was away with a chest infection (Not man-flu or swine-flu) he was the one who was my substitute.
However.
He has then crushed my hopes and aspirations of him falling madly in love with me and begging for my love, only for me to politely decline and float away all-fairy-like with a halo of sunshine... Yes, crushed all that purely by one mean flippant comment. He has a mean streak and I do not like it. It has put me off.
Then there is the Boyfriend. As he was off for a total week I got a feel for what it would be like if he wasn't featured in my life. If he didn't exist. I quite liked it. I could hang out with my friends and not have to wait for someone who is running late at the end of the day, I could choose whoever I wanted to sit with at lunch without any fear of leaving people out, I could flirt like mad with anyone and nobody could stop me.
However. (Ha, again.)
I missed having someone to help me find my bus so I don't look crazy walking towards a bus only to realise it's not mine. (Damn mild shortsightedness). I missed someone waiting at my locker after I've just taught wild year nines to calm me down. I missed having someone looked agast every morning at how lovely I looked.
My life is full of contradictions and inconsistencies at the minute but it is a touch more interesting than the norm, so I don't mind.
:D
Sunday, 17 January 2010
Big Mouth!
What the heck is wrong with me?
I cannot answer a question dishonestly to friends. I can lie to a perfect stranger pretty convincingly or if needs be to someone I know if it's to protect something. But if a friend asks me a question and complete honesty, I just blurt all.
I basically just admitted a heck of a lot of stuff to most of my friends which I sooooo shouldn't have.
One friend looked totally freaked at my answers like they were totally uncomfortable with being there and disgraced by our behaviour.
Luckily Curltop was missing and that one person probably would have made me hold my tongue, I can't open up as much with them around. I think they judge me.
But yeah, I had a nice time round the Thin One's house where this whole thing happened. Happy Birthday to him by the way. I thought it was going to be a replay of when we went to P. Diddy's house and just watched big bang theory for ages and didn't actually talk but actually after we moved into a cooler area people began to chat and the Tv was ignored. Even the Thin One's porn collection got ignored after a while.
Oh and Creep and the Boyfriend seemed to have become friends a little better. Boyfriend may still hold a mini grudge against him but he's been a darling and playing nice.
I cannot answer a question dishonestly to friends. I can lie to a perfect stranger pretty convincingly or if needs be to someone I know if it's to protect something. But if a friend asks me a question and complete honesty, I just blurt all.
I basically just admitted a heck of a lot of stuff to most of my friends which I sooooo shouldn't have.
One friend looked totally freaked at my answers like they were totally uncomfortable with being there and disgraced by our behaviour.
Luckily Curltop was missing and that one person probably would have made me hold my tongue, I can't open up as much with them around. I think they judge me.
But yeah, I had a nice time round the Thin One's house where this whole thing happened. Happy Birthday to him by the way. I thought it was going to be a replay of when we went to P. Diddy's house and just watched big bang theory for ages and didn't actually talk but actually after we moved into a cooler area people began to chat and the Tv was ignored. Even the Thin One's porn collection got ignored after a while.
Oh and Creep and the Boyfriend seemed to have become friends a little better. Boyfriend may still hold a mini grudge against him but he's been a darling and playing nice.
Thursday, 14 January 2010
Poetry in Motion
There once was a girl. Many stories start with something as simple as one person, one person in billions and billions who has a story to tell. Sometimes the story is dramatic or even melodramatic, it could be happy or sad but most stories are written to tap into your heart and scrawl something new.
This girl was nothing spectacular. Hair that was only just brown in the light and eyes that became totally black in the dark, skin a faint gold that fades into a pale pink-yellow in the winter, the cold pinching her cheeks until they shone red.
It was winter where this story stands although it is being written every minute of every hour of every day. Today she walks, wind biting her lips and making it hard. She bites the insides of her cheeks as she does every day, a nervous habit that has now slipped into a boredom habit. Walking steadily she hobbled across the icy road where the snow was compacted and black with the dirt of too many tyres.She didn't like the snow, it only caused disruption where it fell and it always spent too long fading away. Not to mention snow days were rare due to the absolute determined opening of the school. That's where she was headed.
Such a miserable place, full of measuring people up to someone elses standards. You could only feel like you had achieved something if someone else told you that you had. Could they measure wit? Or creative flair? Or a good sense of humour? She thought not, and those were the things that mattered in a person; at least to her they were.
But there was one thing spurring her on in this repeated journey to and from school. A boy, or rather a man. Perhaps both. Someone stuck in that unnamable stage of maturity, where the innocence of childhood has faded but they haven't yet been stained with the cynicism of adulthood. A beautiful stage she thought. Many of the stories she read were based on people in this stage, growing through experiences rather than time. She was in love with this person, or so she suspected.
When they were together it was comfortable whether words were said or not. When they were apart a faint longing touched their minds no matter what they were doing. He accepted her; chips on each shoulder and all. She could be raw and honest with him and he smiled with his blue eyes and would stroke her hand claiming that it didn't matter.
But most of all he forgave her. Forgiveness is the one thing that can solidify love. If someone can accept your mistake, your broken being, and continue to love you all the same; that is love. And that is what he did. She had expected to see an accusing look in his eye asking 'Why?' but she was wrong. His eyes were clear as water and held only an affectionate sympathy for her.
They shared their pain. His of the betrayal he overcame and hers of the mistakes that would forever cast a shadow over her life. But at least someone would step into the shadow to be with her.
xx
Keep writing your life story people.
This girl was nothing spectacular. Hair that was only just brown in the light and eyes that became totally black in the dark, skin a faint gold that fades into a pale pink-yellow in the winter, the cold pinching her cheeks until they shone red.
It was winter where this story stands although it is being written every minute of every hour of every day. Today she walks, wind biting her lips and making it hard. She bites the insides of her cheeks as she does every day, a nervous habit that has now slipped into a boredom habit. Walking steadily she hobbled across the icy road where the snow was compacted and black with the dirt of too many tyres.She didn't like the snow, it only caused disruption where it fell and it always spent too long fading away. Not to mention snow days were rare due to the absolute determined opening of the school. That's where she was headed.
Such a miserable place, full of measuring people up to someone elses standards. You could only feel like you had achieved something if someone else told you that you had. Could they measure wit? Or creative flair? Or a good sense of humour? She thought not, and those were the things that mattered in a person; at least to her they were.
But there was one thing spurring her on in this repeated journey to and from school. A boy, or rather a man. Perhaps both. Someone stuck in that unnamable stage of maturity, where the innocence of childhood has faded but they haven't yet been stained with the cynicism of adulthood. A beautiful stage she thought. Many of the stories she read were based on people in this stage, growing through experiences rather than time. She was in love with this person, or so she suspected.
When they were together it was comfortable whether words were said or not. When they were apart a faint longing touched their minds no matter what they were doing. He accepted her; chips on each shoulder and all. She could be raw and honest with him and he smiled with his blue eyes and would stroke her hand claiming that it didn't matter.
But most of all he forgave her. Forgiveness is the one thing that can solidify love. If someone can accept your mistake, your broken being, and continue to love you all the same; that is love. And that is what he did. She had expected to see an accusing look in his eye asking 'Why?' but she was wrong. His eyes were clear as water and held only an affectionate sympathy for her.
They shared their pain. His of the betrayal he overcame and hers of the mistakes that would forever cast a shadow over her life. But at least someone would step into the shadow to be with her.
xx
Keep writing your life story people.
Tuesday, 29 December 2009
Dear Blog,
I'm fresh out of optimism in word form.
But I'm slowly getting back to my blissful happiness.
Only stares worth a million curses to dread.
But I've got a lover worth a million wishes to keep.
But I'm slowly getting back to my blissful happiness.
Only stares worth a million curses to dread.
But I've got a lover worth a million wishes to keep.
Saturday, 26 December 2009
Coming Clean
I had a very big secret from my boyfriend that only my nearest and dearest knew about and it was tearing me apart. For almost three months I have been totally locked off from the world, throwing myself into my relationship to repent for something he didn't know.
It was a big, horrible, monstrous, I'm-going-to-ruin-your-life kind of mistake, the ones you wish you could turn back time to stop, I'd give a limb to go back. I asked him what he would do if I ever had done something like that. He said he's deleted all of my details and make me dissapear from his life.
It was a hollow threat to say the least. We are both hopelessly in love. One teary, very teary, phonecall made me come clean, wipe the slate totally spotless and we started again.
In love stronger than ever, at the weakest and more destroyed part of our relationship yet.
"Learn to appreciate failure - and respect it. Acknowledge the courage it's taken to get that far. Seeing other strive, fail and strive again spurs us all on. For we are witnessing the glorious, indomitable human spirit in action." - N.G
"Never forget the power in forgiveness. It can be incredibly releasing - it can flush you clean, uplift you, move you on." -N.G
It was a big, horrible, monstrous, I'm-going-to-ruin-your-life kind of mistake, the ones you wish you could turn back time to stop, I'd give a limb to go back. I asked him what he would do if I ever had done something like that. He said he's deleted all of my details and make me dissapear from his life.
It was a hollow threat to say the least. We are both hopelessly in love. One teary, very teary, phonecall made me come clean, wipe the slate totally spotless and we started again.
In love stronger than ever, at the weakest and more destroyed part of our relationship yet.
"Learn to appreciate failure - and respect it. Acknowledge the courage it's taken to get that far. Seeing other strive, fail and strive again spurs us all on. For we are witnessing the glorious, indomitable human spirit in action." - N.G
"Never forget the power in forgiveness. It can be incredibly releasing - it can flush you clean, uplift you, move you on." -N.G
Friday, 25 December 2009
Merry Xmas
I say bonjour because I look so totally french today, beret and all.
Anyways, it's Xmas. I say Xmas because I'm not religious so it's not CHRISTmas to me. I am listening to my ye olde CDs through my slammin new beats system, a beast of a speaker hooked up to me new portable dvd player, banging dude.
WALK THIS WAY!
TALK THIS WAY!
Well I got alot of stuffs for Xmas, all of it I adore. This hat has barely left my head. Thankyou Boyf's parents and sis!
Most random present award goes to: MUM with the mini sewing machine! (Last year it was a full pink toolkit. Maddo)
Most useful present award goes to: DAD and maybe his girlf. For the book of how to do just about everything! I will never need to google a skill again. :D
Cutest present award goes to: MUMS BOYF for the heatable pink bunny whom I've called Flump. ^^
The 'Totally Me' present goes to: MUM again for the black and peacock feather fan. *Dribble*
The 'OMG' present goes to: SISTER for the four Twilight Saga notebooks.
And the rest I just adore so much!
It's been so relaxed this Xmas, we downsized on pressies so less money worries, dinner was more relaxed, mum was actually chilled out for once and it's just been super sweet! At midnight I got like 4 texts from people saying Merry Xmas and I was like "Awww GUYYYSS".
Where the hell am I going to put that mini sewing machine?...
I keep having pretty weird dreams where I deface Flame's property, leaving huge signs proclaiming what an ass he is and like spraypainting sheep to spell *DICK* and stuff. I'm so mad at him, and mad at myself 'cause part of me is the opposite of mad at him.
On the other hand, it sounds cheesy and horrible but I have to get it out of my system. I had the most amazing experience with the boyf. I just felt so close to him, emotionally and yes, spiritually. I feel like I've had an epiphany or an awakening. I miss him now and I only saw him like two days ago and he's texting me as I write. I feel like I've tore him open and it's up to me to mend him and sew him back up again.
I asked him what he saw when I looked in the mirror, what he thought of himself. He said he onl looked in the mirror to do his hair and doesn't look at himself if he can help it. He thinks he's horribly unnatractive and every compliment I give him he shrugs off with one for me.
Have I done this by messing around? I think I've broken a man...
:'(
Saturday, 12 December 2009
My dirty little secret is....
I've fallen back in love with anime. Schock horror!
I won't say which one I'm watching but it's not one of the giants which has like 300 episodes, that would just really tire me, never being able to see the end.
So yeah, it's really cute. I'm at my boyfriends house. He's just got out the shower and smells absolutely scrumptious, I could just eat him up. ^^
I'm trying to watch it but it's wireless internet connection so it's pretty damn useless to be honest.
Apparently we are going out tonight with his aunty and uncle. Hopefully I can skank an invite. I got him the main bulk of his Xmas pressy today when I was out in the town with the Krewe. Helped P.H start getting pressies aswell. He's got absolutely no idea.
So anyways, today we met up to hang around town and ended up getting pizza and sitting about boyf's house just having a laugh and eating.
New member B.H had her first day out with the Krewe and she did look a little bit awkward to start off with but she commented that she thought out Krewe was lovely and that she enjoyed herself, so that made me feel nice.
In regards to other things. Crush is pretty much gone. Flame I now pretty much hate. Family is all good, christmas is shaping up well although I still have a few presents to get an literally only days to get them. I've even pretty much sorted out new year aswell.
I won't say which one I'm watching but it's not one of the giants which has like 300 episodes, that would just really tire me, never being able to see the end.
So yeah, it's really cute. I'm at my boyfriends house. He's just got out the shower and smells absolutely scrumptious, I could just eat him up. ^^
I'm trying to watch it but it's wireless internet connection so it's pretty damn useless to be honest.
Apparently we are going out tonight with his aunty and uncle. Hopefully I can skank an invite. I got him the main bulk of his Xmas pressy today when I was out in the town with the Krewe. Helped P.H start getting pressies aswell. He's got absolutely no idea.
So anyways, today we met up to hang around town and ended up getting pizza and sitting about boyf's house just having a laugh and eating.
New member B.H had her first day out with the Krewe and she did look a little bit awkward to start off with but she commented that she thought out Krewe was lovely and that she enjoyed herself, so that made me feel nice.
In regards to other things. Crush is pretty much gone. Flame I now pretty much hate. Family is all good, christmas is shaping up well although I still have a few presents to get an literally only days to get them. I've even pretty much sorted out new year aswell.
Saturday, 5 December 2009
Unfaithful
I feel it in the air
As I'm doing my hair
Preparing for another date
A kiss upon my cheek
As he reluctantly
Asks if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hanging with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know
Where I'm about to go
And we know it very well
Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...
A murderer
Our love, his trust
I might as well take a gun and put it to his head
Get it over with
As I'm doing my hair
Preparing for another date
A kiss upon my cheek
As he reluctantly
Asks if I'm gonna be out late
I say I won't be long
Just hanging with the girls
A lie I didn't have to tell
Because we both know
Where I'm about to go
And we know it very well
Cause I know that he knows I'm unfaithful
And it kills him inside
To know that I am happy with some other guy
I can see him dying
I don't wanna do this anymore
I don't wanna be the reason why
Everytime I walk out the door
I see him die a little more inside
I don't wanna hurt him anymore
I don't wanna take away his life
I don't wanna be...
A murderer
Our love, his trust
I might as well take a gun and put it to his head
Get it over with
Thursday, 26 November 2009
My Day - Episode Five
Today was a lovely day!
Woke up, had a reasonable normal breakfast - eggy bread. Listened to the whole new Mika album on my journey to school, that's how long it is! Then had a general excited feeling for the whole day, despite the fact I thought it was Wednesday when it was actually Thursday, much confusion. Good debates on topics such as Euthanasia, Organ Transplants and Abortion in my structured study. Fun Bio lesson. Nice.
Boyf makes me happy recently, apart from the slap incident, he's been perfect. Looking so kissable and loads of people compliment me and tell me how lucky I am to have him. I feel lucky and happy happy happy people.
For all you people still pondering my previous crush, stop! It's a blog which is supposedly meant to keep everyone anonymous..ish. Nosy buggars! Update on him. He's talking to me again and still referring to me as "apple of my desire". I think he's moved on, apparently he's been trying to wiggle his way into some other girls pants. Thank fuck. Mind your language. Sorry.
Anyways, Flame as I have started to refer to him, has again been confusing. I got another wink the other day, ignored today and for two days on the trot we had a reasonably conversation. Ridiculous. He seems to be alot better with his girlfriend, problems sort themselves out to make way for the next in their world.
My actual liking for him is starting to wane again. Oh! I was wearing a low cut top the other day and when he noticed I got a shocked gasp and stare, mostly in a jokey way. Then he tried to cover me up which to me was funny. I like the attention but really I just felt a bit crushed. He doesn't want to look at me like I'm attractive so I'm giving up again. Pointless to even like him, never mind pining after what I can't have. Besides, I'd only get him and finally go "Don't want it anymore." Knowing me.
Enough flame talk.
I got a D in my Psychology test today. Gutted. I'm meant to getting an A overall so that is just a little too far off for comfort really. Oh well I suppose, I'll just make sure I do a bit better in the next one.
My sis bought my a new diary for my birthday and I am soo looking forward to switching. Currently I'm on Lily, the one after Belle. I think I may call the next one Beau. It's cute to say 'cause it sounds like Bo and it still means beautiful! ((Actually it means like handsome, admirer or sweetheart;) )) Which is how life should feel really.
Anyways, I'm rambling. And welcome to the boyf who is a follower of the Belle Blog now. I'll still continue to bitch about him though, don't worry folks. :)
Woke up, had a reasonable normal breakfast - eggy bread. Listened to the whole new Mika album on my journey to school, that's how long it is! Then had a general excited feeling for the whole day, despite the fact I thought it was Wednesday when it was actually Thursday, much confusion. Good debates on topics such as Euthanasia, Organ Transplants and Abortion in my structured study. Fun Bio lesson. Nice.
Boyf makes me happy recently, apart from the slap incident, he's been perfect. Looking so kissable and loads of people compliment me and tell me how lucky I am to have him. I feel lucky and happy happy happy people.
For all you people still pondering my previous crush, stop! It's a blog which is supposedly meant to keep everyone anonymous..ish. Nosy buggars! Update on him. He's talking to me again and still referring to me as "apple of my desire". I think he's moved on, apparently he's been trying to wiggle his way into some other girls pants. Thank fuck. Mind your language. Sorry.
Anyways, Flame as I have started to refer to him, has again been confusing. I got another wink the other day, ignored today and for two days on the trot we had a reasonably conversation. Ridiculous. He seems to be alot better with his girlfriend, problems sort themselves out to make way for the next in their world.
My actual liking for him is starting to wane again. Oh! I was wearing a low cut top the other day and when he noticed I got a shocked gasp and stare, mostly in a jokey way. Then he tried to cover me up which to me was funny. I like the attention but really I just felt a bit crushed. He doesn't want to look at me like I'm attractive so I'm giving up again. Pointless to even like him, never mind pining after what I can't have. Besides, I'd only get him and finally go "Don't want it anymore." Knowing me.
Enough flame talk.
I got a D in my Psychology test today. Gutted. I'm meant to getting an A overall so that is just a little too far off for comfort really. Oh well I suppose, I'll just make sure I do a bit better in the next one.
My sis bought my a new diary for my birthday and I am soo looking forward to switching. Currently I'm on Lily, the one after Belle. I think I may call the next one Beau. It's cute to say 'cause it sounds like Bo and it still means beautiful! ((Actually it means like handsome, admirer or sweetheart;) )) Which is how life should feel really.
Anyways, I'm rambling. And welcome to the boyf who is a follower of the Belle Blog now. I'll still continue to bitch about him though, don't worry folks. :)
Tuesday, 24 November 2009
My Day - Episode Four
Well today was mainly uneventful. Woke up, had some lovely cheesey pasta for breakfast, yes breakfast.
In my free my boyfriend searched for a picture of a girl in a bikini and then sat there nodding in approval. He got a swift slap for that and then when he cornered me later to try and find out what was wrong, obviously he was too dim to have twigged, I kneed him (very gently) in the balls. Deserved I have to say. You don't pin a girl to the wall to find out what you did wrong, that just screams "kick me."
At lunch I felt bad cause I sat on a table with two friends with all of my crew, took up the whole table and B.S came over red-faced and embaressed and was like "You didn't save me a seat!" and then stormed off, threw her lunch in the bin and didn't eat. Now I felt bad but the two who were meant to save her a seat said "She's only trying to make us feel bad. I don't get a moment alone now, she's constantly there or texting me like 'can I sit with you?'. She has other friends but she relies on me totally which is unfair. I don't feel bad. I've done nothing wrong." To be honest I think she is right.
I spoke to my flame today. He looked totally hot yesterday, rain swept and in sporty clothes, muscles galore. Today he just looked totally out of it, him and his girlfriend are having problems and he really just doesn't need it on top of his work load. Poor thang.
I also went swimming today, wore my trampiest clothes ever which was hilarious. Had a nice laugh with H.P who I went with. We basically do a couple of lengths and then go and get crisps. We suck, but hey.
While we were waiting for the bus we were at the stop talking when the bus totally drove past us! He didn't even stop so I ran to the junction and like mouthed at the guy "What the fuck?!?" and he just drove off. I had to wait another twenty minutes in the dark, cold, rainy, miserable night on my own. Not happy.
Finally got home, had a long hot shower and now I'm off to do my hair for tommorow and chill out.
Computer still isn't working, internets still down. We are going to call someone in to fix it. Until then, I'll sneak moments on my mum's and sister's computers.
Love Belle.
In my free my boyfriend searched for a picture of a girl in a bikini and then sat there nodding in approval. He got a swift slap for that and then when he cornered me later to try and find out what was wrong, obviously he was too dim to have twigged, I kneed him (very gently) in the balls. Deserved I have to say. You don't pin a girl to the wall to find out what you did wrong, that just screams "kick me."
At lunch I felt bad cause I sat on a table with two friends with all of my crew, took up the whole table and B.S came over red-faced and embaressed and was like "You didn't save me a seat!" and then stormed off, threw her lunch in the bin and didn't eat. Now I felt bad but the two who were meant to save her a seat said "She's only trying to make us feel bad. I don't get a moment alone now, she's constantly there or texting me like 'can I sit with you?'. She has other friends but she relies on me totally which is unfair. I don't feel bad. I've done nothing wrong." To be honest I think she is right.
I spoke to my flame today. He looked totally hot yesterday, rain swept and in sporty clothes, muscles galore. Today he just looked totally out of it, him and his girlfriend are having problems and he really just doesn't need it on top of his work load. Poor thang.
I also went swimming today, wore my trampiest clothes ever which was hilarious. Had a nice laugh with H.P who I went with. We basically do a couple of lengths and then go and get crisps. We suck, but hey.
While we were waiting for the bus we were at the stop talking when the bus totally drove past us! He didn't even stop so I ran to the junction and like mouthed at the guy "What the fuck?!?" and he just drove off. I had to wait another twenty minutes in the dark, cold, rainy, miserable night on my own. Not happy.
Finally got home, had a long hot shower and now I'm off to do my hair for tommorow and chill out.
Computer still isn't working, internets still down. We are going to call someone in to fix it. Until then, I'll sneak moments on my mum's and sister's computers.
Love Belle.
Sunday, 22 November 2009
The past week
WELL!
Where do I begin? I last spoke to you on the fifteenth - mum's birthday. Came back from my dads, handing my computer Charlie over reluctantly. Then monday was boring... tuesday I was meant to go swimming with H.P but she cancelled again, family stuff. And then wednesday I watched true blood, I can't stop myself! It's so addictive, although that episode wasn't as exciting as others I have to say. Thursday was my birthday, and my boyfs b'day. I gave him a ukelele for his b'day, he wanted one and I'm an awesome person so there. I got a book called Pleasure : An Almanac For the Heart by Nikki Gemmel. She wrote a very frisky book called The Bride Stripped Bare that I basically fell in love with. Now that she's not anonymous, she's just awesome.... Anyways, pleasure is basically a guide to life, advice on all the parts of a womans life, completely uncensored. I'm in love.
Continuing, boyf also got me tickets to go see the new Twilight movie: New Moon. So much better than I thought it was going to be. Topless men galore. Embarassing moment: My phone has an alarm that goes off at ten O'clock to tell me to take my pill and it won't stop going off until you press a button to shut it up. You guesses it, even though my phone was off, it switched itself back on to play this screaming alarm in the middle of the movie. I was sooo embaressed, boyf had to help me out of my fluster. To make it worse, it was then on and my friend texted me!! The horror.
That was Friday night, and then I went home, got some well liked sleep. Woke up, had chinese noodles for breakfast - best meal ever. Then went over to boyf's house. We played on Fable, which I am addicted to. <3 Then he had a party thang round his house with peeps. There was around 9 people there, and our two beloved friends A.G and H.S finally made out after seven months of waiting. They both went home, separately before you guys start making up rumours. :o le gaspo. Anyways, they went home and seven people stayed. Out of those seven, FOUR threw up. The worst was flirty friend T.S who was sick all over the bedroom and our poor victim of a friend P.D. Poor guy.
To end it all we slept downstairs on the couch and left the sick people upstairs.
Still was an awesome night though.
My crush has now ended and an old flame has been fed, as it was never out, just put on low.
Where do I begin? I last spoke to you on the fifteenth - mum's birthday. Came back from my dads, handing my computer Charlie over reluctantly. Then monday was boring... tuesday I was meant to go swimming with H.P but she cancelled again, family stuff. And then wednesday I watched true blood, I can't stop myself! It's so addictive, although that episode wasn't as exciting as others I have to say. Thursday was my birthday, and my boyfs b'day. I gave him a ukelele for his b'day, he wanted one and I'm an awesome person so there. I got a book called Pleasure : An Almanac For the Heart by Nikki Gemmel. She wrote a very frisky book called The Bride Stripped Bare that I basically fell in love with. Now that she's not anonymous, she's just awesome.... Anyways, pleasure is basically a guide to life, advice on all the parts of a womans life, completely uncensored. I'm in love.
Continuing, boyf also got me tickets to go see the new Twilight movie: New Moon. So much better than I thought it was going to be. Topless men galore. Embarassing moment: My phone has an alarm that goes off at ten O'clock to tell me to take my pill and it won't stop going off until you press a button to shut it up. You guesses it, even though my phone was off, it switched itself back on to play this screaming alarm in the middle of the movie. I was sooo embaressed, boyf had to help me out of my fluster. To make it worse, it was then on and my friend texted me!! The horror.
That was Friday night, and then I went home, got some well liked sleep. Woke up, had chinese noodles for breakfast - best meal ever. Then went over to boyf's house. We played on Fable, which I am addicted to. <3 Then he had a party thang round his house with peeps. There was around 9 people there, and our two beloved friends A.G and H.S finally made out after seven months of waiting. They both went home, separately before you guys start making up rumours. :o le gaspo. Anyways, they went home and seven people stayed. Out of those seven, FOUR threw up. The worst was flirty friend T.S who was sick all over the bedroom and our poor victim of a friend P.D. Poor guy.
To end it all we slept downstairs on the couch and left the sick people upstairs.
Still was an awesome night though.
My crush has now ended and an old flame has been fed, as it was never out, just put on low.
Sunday, 15 November 2009
Much newses
New News number one!
My mum's birthday is today! Woo! Happy birthday momma! <3
New News number two!
I went out TWICE to parties this weekend. On friday there was a gig at Saint Brendans (Some dingy pub in Corby) which turned out to be crap and since I wasn't drinking, there was no point in me being there so I came home. And I felt guilty for being out so soon after the news about boyf's gran.
Oh and the other party was last night, Saturday. People ran out of drink but me not having any had a good time anyways, just hanging with people. Had a nice dance with the host. Bwahaha
New News number three!
It's my birthday and boyf's on thursday coming up! Yes, same day. "It's destinyyyyy" XD
New News number four! (Almost wrote three, that's how much I suck at maths)
Twilight- New Moon comes out Friday! I'm going to the evening showing and will probably report back once my computer gets back from the Daddy Doctors. Which brings me on to...
New News number five!
My computer has gone completely kaput. I'm writing from my computer at dad's as my usual, Charlie, has caught a bug and therefore is going to go to Daddy Doctors as he can fix anything nerdy and technical.
My mum's birthday is today! Woo! Happy birthday momma! <3
New News number two!
I went out TWICE to parties this weekend. On friday there was a gig at Saint Brendans (Some dingy pub in Corby) which turned out to be crap and since I wasn't drinking, there was no point in me being there so I came home. And I felt guilty for being out so soon after the news about boyf's gran.
Oh and the other party was last night, Saturday. People ran out of drink but me not having any had a good time anyways, just hanging with people. Had a nice dance with the host. Bwahaha
New News number three!
It's my birthday and boyf's on thursday coming up! Yes, same day. "It's destinyyyyy" XD
New News number four! (Almost wrote three, that's how much I suck at maths)
Twilight- New Moon comes out Friday! I'm going to the evening showing and will probably report back once my computer gets back from the Daddy Doctors. Which brings me on to...
New News number five!
My computer has gone completely kaput. I'm writing from my computer at dad's as my usual, Charlie, has caught a bug and therefore is going to go to Daddy Doctors as he can fix anything nerdy and technical.
Friday, 6 November 2009
Elaborating
My last post was meant to be an explanation included however I didn't really get around to that.
Last friday my boyfriend went to a party round someone's house and I didn't know them and couldn't be arsed so didn't go.
I was of the opinion that all had gone well and everything was hunky dory.
I texted him on the Saturday morning as we were organising to meet up with friends for the day. He said he felt sick and putting two and two together: Hangover.
I left him for a few more hours to recover until eventually he dragged himself out of bed and we got together with friends round his house and had a wonderful time. One fried who had arrived late needed to grab some dinner so I went with him to get a kebab, he had also been at said party and told me that boyf had been smoking pot part of the night in the garage.
He had once had a toke of a spliff at the busstop and I had gone skitz at him warning him that if he decided to go down that route again I would be severely dissapointed and my opinion of him would totally change- what do you know, he does it again.
I confronted him about it when the party died down a little and he insisted it was only one toke and the only reason he seemed so bad was because he had mixed a bit of drink with drugs and it had had a bad affect.
I said okay and that I wasn't too bothered, his choice and all.
We had a nice saturday and sunday
Sunday night I had a late night anyways and watched a movie. finally got to sleep at half eleven and quarter past midnight my phone starts ringing.
It's Luke, confessing all in the middle of the night. "Babe it wasn't just one toke I had probably more than three and I was there for more of the night."
Obv I was not only completely tired and out of it, but pissed that he had rang my up in the middle of the night. I can't even remember what I said. I sort of a had a moan, told him it was okay really and to leave me to sleep.
Then on tuesday night I rang him to talk it over and it suddenly comes up that a girl in our year randomly hit on him and he was saved by one of his mates who took her off his hands! Yet another thing he had hidden from me.
I was not a happy bunny to say the least.
Obv this was all a while ago and it's pretty much died down now and is okay, but WHAT AN ASS!
Last friday my boyfriend went to a party round someone's house and I didn't know them and couldn't be arsed so didn't go.
I was of the opinion that all had gone well and everything was hunky dory.
I texted him on the Saturday morning as we were organising to meet up with friends for the day. He said he felt sick and putting two and two together: Hangover.
I left him for a few more hours to recover until eventually he dragged himself out of bed and we got together with friends round his house and had a wonderful time. One fried who had arrived late needed to grab some dinner so I went with him to get a kebab, he had also been at said party and told me that boyf had been smoking pot part of the night in the garage.
He had once had a toke of a spliff at the busstop and I had gone skitz at him warning him that if he decided to go down that route again I would be severely dissapointed and my opinion of him would totally change- what do you know, he does it again.
I confronted him about it when the party died down a little and he insisted it was only one toke and the only reason he seemed so bad was because he had mixed a bit of drink with drugs and it had had a bad affect.
I said okay and that I wasn't too bothered, his choice and all.
We had a nice saturday and sunday
Sunday night I had a late night anyways and watched a movie. finally got to sleep at half eleven and quarter past midnight my phone starts ringing.
It's Luke, confessing all in the middle of the night. "Babe it wasn't just one toke I had probably more than three and I was there for more of the night."
Obv I was not only completely tired and out of it, but pissed that he had rang my up in the middle of the night. I can't even remember what I said. I sort of a had a moan, told him it was okay really and to leave me to sleep.
Then on tuesday night I rang him to talk it over and it suddenly comes up that a girl in our year randomly hit on him and he was saved by one of his mates who took her off his hands! Yet another thing he had hidden from me.
I was not a happy bunny to say the least.
Obv this was all a while ago and it's pretty much died down now and is okay, but WHAT AN ASS!
Tuesday, 3 November 2009
Thursday, 29 October 2009
3,4,5th Jan 09 - Diary
Dear Belle,
Happy new year!
Welcome to 2009.
New year. New resolutions and stuff. I was with boyf for New Years day bells. It was magical. We kissed at the bells and fireworks went off. I'll never forget it. x
Magical.
Dear Belle, Just went to see the movie Australia. Very good! directed by Baz Luhrman who directed Moulin Rouge. So yeah he is a born genius.
Dear Belle, Had a mini tiff with J (Supposed to be bessy girl mate) Well not really. I just got upset that we weren't as close anymore.
My hierarchy goes
Boyf
J. L and A. P
C.L, B.R, H.P and M.M
Hers goes
J.A
L.?, A.A, M.M
H. P and B.R
Me.
You can see why I got upset. We watched Hotel Rwanda in school. It's about a massacre in Africe. I thought about boyf and what he had witnessed. Got pretty emotional. I never really realised what he went through but now I understand.
Ciao. xxx
P.s School was boring as ever.
Happy new year!
Welcome to 2009.
New year. New resolutions and stuff. I was with boyf for New Years day bells. It was magical. We kissed at the bells and fireworks went off. I'll never forget it. x
Magical.
Dear Belle, Just went to see the movie Australia. Very good! directed by Baz Luhrman who directed Moulin Rouge. So yeah he is a born genius.
Dear Belle, Had a mini tiff with J (Supposed to be bessy girl mate) Well not really. I just got upset that we weren't as close anymore.
My hierarchy goes
Boyf
J. L and A. P
C.L, B.R, H.P and M.M
Hers goes
J.A
L.?, A.A, M.M
H. P and B.R
Me.
You can see why I got upset. We watched Hotel Rwanda in school. It's about a massacre in Africe. I thought about boyf and what he had witnessed. Got pretty emotional. I never really realised what he went through but now I understand.
Ciao. xxx
P.s School was boring as ever.
26th December 08 - Diary
Dear Black book, boxing day with the family plus Luke went well. The only thing that worries me is mum's special attention to almost every move I make. I kept reading a magazine when he went to play on the wii and apparently that was enough to cause suspicion. She was asing if me and the boyf were okay and she's figured out that he's more into me than vice versa. Which is true.
All in all it did go pretty well. Everyone likes the boyf although step-dad called him 'pompous'. Cousin's boyfriend got called 'chavvy' though and I think pompous isn't as bad.
Have a headache
Goodnight.
xx
(Oh and it's not that I don't love him, I just know he likes me more, as he is not quite as accepting of a distant future break-up.)
All in all it did go pretty well. Everyone likes the boyf although step-dad called him 'pompous'. Cousin's boyfriend got called 'chavvy' though and I think pompous isn't as bad.
Have a headache
Goodnight.
xx
(Oh and it's not that I don't love him, I just know he likes me more, as he is not quite as accepting of a distant future break-up.)
Friday, 23 October 2009
My Day - Episode Two
Well. Today I woke up round my boyfriend's house. (I love being able to say that!)
He's so adorable when he sleeps. He's finally realised I can't sleep with him touching me in any way, like even toes touching my leg, so I got a really good nights sleep. He told me apparently I sleep weird. I don't really snore, I just have heavy breathing that borders on snore and sometimes I stop breathing momentarily and I seem a bit... you know... dead.
Then we had a nice morning hug/tousle. You know when you start hugging then you realise your in a prime position to make your feet tickle theirs and they can't move? No? Perhaps it's just an us thing.
Got up and showered eventually. Had my first breakfast of frosties, bleurgh. Then we went to my house. Trying to scooter on the side of a bike whilst holding a ukelele is more difficult than you'd think! Got to my dads house, had second breakfast. Lay down watching tevo, realised I was bored shitless. Like actually bored out of my MIND!
So we played Payday. It's like a kids version of monopoly that moves really fast and instead of moving around streets on a board, you move around days on a calender. It's more fun than monopoly. Boyf won, surprise.
Dad came home. Had my suitcase packed and I am HOOOMEEE!
Aka, back at my mums house where I spend the majority of my time, and can chill out muuucch easier. Bring on the nail painting and scented candles. My room smells crazey when I'm chillaxing.
So yes. Now I am back at my house, mum's house. Just being in my room. I should be unpacking really but hey, what's more important?... Yeah. Unpacking. I'll get to that.
I think I may have to take pictures of my room to give you a tour in a blog sometime. Yeah, that's a good idea.
He's so adorable when he sleeps. He's finally realised I can't sleep with him touching me in any way, like even toes touching my leg, so I got a really good nights sleep. He told me apparently I sleep weird. I don't really snore, I just have heavy breathing that borders on snore and sometimes I stop breathing momentarily and I seem a bit... you know... dead.
Then we had a nice morning hug/tousle. You know when you start hugging then you realise your in a prime position to make your feet tickle theirs and they can't move? No? Perhaps it's just an us thing.
Got up and showered eventually. Had my first breakfast of frosties, bleurgh. Then we went to my house. Trying to scooter on the side of a bike whilst holding a ukelele is more difficult than you'd think! Got to my dads house, had second breakfast. Lay down watching tevo, realised I was bored shitless. Like actually bored out of my MIND!
So we played Payday. It's like a kids version of monopoly that moves really fast and instead of moving around streets on a board, you move around days on a calender. It's more fun than monopoly. Boyf won, surprise.
Dad came home. Had my suitcase packed and I am HOOOMEEE!
Aka, back at my mums house where I spend the majority of my time, and can chill out muuucch easier. Bring on the nail painting and scented candles. My room smells crazey when I'm chillaxing.
So yes. Now I am back at my house, mum's house. Just being in my room. I should be unpacking really but hey, what's more important?... Yeah. Unpacking. I'll get to that.
I think I may have to take pictures of my room to give you a tour in a blog sometime. Yeah, that's a good idea.
Monday, 19 October 2009
Something Epic Happened!
Surprise surprise I actually have something interesting to tell you.
My mother changed her mind. Oh, you heard me right, she changed her mind. Epic.
So the full story. I have been dating my boyfriend since I was fifteen and us being totally in-lurve we started getting jiggy a while after we had got together. My mother found out about this through my dad, who accidentily almost barged in on us. Not fun.
The parents are separated and have been since I was eight. In fact I really should have mentioned this earlier. I will do a quick family run down.
Mum and Dad, both nuts, dad's the soft one, obsessed with dvds and online gaming into the early hours. Mum is the protective one, rightly so. They split when I was around 8 years old, the day before my older sister's tenth birthday. Ouch or what. Anyways, they had split up. Mum found her partner and he moved in with us when I was nine and living with mum and sis. Dad was living alone until recently when he found his partner. She is really nice, we have the same taste in movies and have a laugh. Sis basically lives in her room all the time, hunced over her laptop, computer, psp or a sketchbook. Art obsessive. She's eighteen at the moment. I turn seventeen next month.
Back to the story. I was with the boyf in my room and Dad tried to throw open the door but I managed to tell him not and we then h ad to go downstairs and break the news. He was not best pleased and immediately rang mum and told her. From then on,many rules stood in place. As the parents have begun to accept that the boyf is here to stay, the rules have changed slightly. Instead of not being allowed upstairs together, we are allowed in my room but with the door open. Wow.
One rule looked like it would never budge and that was that I was not allowed to stay round the bofs house and vice versa. However, shock horror, this has changed. Mum had come in once after having a bit of drink and I felt a little brave and decided to get her point of view and put my own across. Despite foaming at the mouth and the partner feeling so awkward he kept changing the subject to Pizza, mum agreed to think about it.
Lo and behold next morning I spoke to mum and she said that I was allowed to stay round the boyfs house.
Hallelujah!
My mother changed her mind. Oh, you heard me right, she changed her mind. Epic.
So the full story. I have been dating my boyfriend since I was fifteen and us being totally in-lurve we started getting jiggy a while after we had got together. My mother found out about this through my dad, who accidentily almost barged in on us. Not fun.
The parents are separated and have been since I was eight. In fact I really should have mentioned this earlier. I will do a quick family run down.
Mum and Dad, both nuts, dad's the soft one, obsessed with dvds and online gaming into the early hours. Mum is the protective one, rightly so. They split when I was around 8 years old, the day before my older sister's tenth birthday. Ouch or what. Anyways, they had split up. Mum found her partner and he moved in with us when I was nine and living with mum and sis. Dad was living alone until recently when he found his partner. She is really nice, we have the same taste in movies and have a laugh. Sis basically lives in her room all the time, hunced over her laptop, computer, psp or a sketchbook. Art obsessive. She's eighteen at the moment. I turn seventeen next month.
Back to the story. I was with the boyf in my room and Dad tried to throw open the door but I managed to tell him not and we then h ad to go downstairs and break the news. He was not best pleased and immediately rang mum and told her. From then on,many rules stood in place. As the parents have begun to accept that the boyf is here to stay, the rules have changed slightly. Instead of not being allowed upstairs together, we are allowed in my room but with the door open. Wow.
One rule looked like it would never budge and that was that I was not allowed to stay round the bofs house and vice versa. However, shock horror, this has changed. Mum had come in once after having a bit of drink and I felt a little brave and decided to get her point of view and put my own across. Despite foaming at the mouth and the partner feeling so awkward he kept changing the subject to Pizza, mum agreed to think about it.
Lo and behold next morning I spoke to mum and she said that I was allowed to stay round the boyfs house.
Hallelujah!
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